Never Ending Story

Tired- cold- slight fewer - tired - cold etc etc etc.
Seems like I will never get well and rested. Last night I went to the bathroom atleast 5 times, maybe more. Baby must be pressing on my bladder. Not what I call a restful night's sleep. Woke up with my cold being worse than it has been the past week.

Being pregnant is a full time job. I'm sure if men were the ones who were pregnant it would be possible to stay at home with full pay from the day of conception.

Yes, yes, I know, I'm tired and cranky.

Last time we saw our midwife she said "being pregnant hasn't been fun for you, has it?".
But I couldn't agree. It's not the being pregnant part; it's having to keep up the rest of your life while nauseaus, exhausted, having constant infections etc that isn't fun.
Baby is lovely and I do love being pregnant. I just wish I didn't have to keep up with everyday life at the same time.

I still have a week of sleeping ahead of me (THANK GOD) before I have to go back to work. I really do want to work. I have so many loose ends I want to tie up before going on maternity leave. I just hope I can muster the energy to do it.

Tonight I was supposed to go with wifey to Guldbaggegalan, the Swedish version of the Oscars. She will have to take her dad as her date instead.
I'm dating the pillow.

That's how much fun I am to live with.

Wifey is amazing. I don't know how she can be so patient and stay so calm and loving.

Take this past weekend for instance; we go out to buy me a dress (to wear to Guldbaggegalan) and really made a bargain (we paid 160 kr, instead of 545 kr). It's a useful dress; a black maternity dress one could wear to many occations. We also found some organic cotton baby clothes on sale. All in all, we got a lot of clothes for a HUGE discount.
Still I get distressed over the money we're spending, now that I'm on sickleave and not sure what it will cost me.

We get home with yours truly exhausted, as always, and very cranky. I think buying me a pineapple and settle in for the night under my blankets might be my only option.
Wifey has to go to work for a few hrs. When I'm getting back from the store our building is closed off due to a smoke alarm. There are police and firemen all over the place and I'm not allowed back in. I almost started crying right then and there and wanted to scream; I'm pregnant, I have to go to bed, I don't care if the building is on fire!
I instead call wifey in tears, and she takes me to work with her in a taxi.

I am so miserable I can't stop crying even at her work. Luckily, there are not a lot of people around.
Wifey puts me in a viewing room with a large sofa and I curl up under our jackets, cry and eat chocolate ice cream (yes, good-bye sugar policy), while wifey runs back and forth beteween me and her clients that just flew in from the US.
I fall asleep to a tv show about princesses trying to date British men, after eating a pint of Ben and Jerry's Phish food.

Then it's home again in a taxi with me in a slightly better mood after my nap.

The next morning, it's the same story all over again. Something sets me off and I start crying and whining and we don't have time to eat a proper lunch before our Profylax class. We grab a quick lunch in the subway on our way there.
I'm in a "I'm so big and fat and hideous" cranky, weepy mood, and only order a sallad with no dressing before the 3,5 hr class.
Which of course leaves me starving and I can't focus the last hour and a half.

The teacher talks about bringing your own food to the delivery room, and there I go, planning what to bring and thinking about all the food I want to eat. Right now.

We do a "mirror " exercise where I'm supposed to say something and wife say it back to me.
I say "I'm hungry", meaning I can't really concentrate on this silly exercise.
Wifey says, with empathy " you are hungry.".
"No, you don't understand, I'm starving!"
"You are starving" wifey earnestly says.
I give up and go to the bathroom.

Just before I am certain I will pass out from hunger we do a final exercise. We are to close our eyes and imagine the first time we are home with our baby. Snuggly tucked into bed, the three of us. With baby sleeping between us.
I start crying.
Of course.