Who's afraid of the Big Bad Birth?

Today wifey and I had an interesting experience. (Ok, Baby was there too, but she slept through most of the meeting).

We had a scheduled appointment at the hospital to talk about my "fear of delivery". This is the only way you can get a referral to talk to the maternity ward before hand apparently.
The funny thing is I have no fear what so ever of the delivery, give or take a few times earlier in my pregnancy when I was exhausted and read that horrid book about pain in childbirth ("Att hantera förlossningssmärtan").

I do however have a "fear" of the medical view of birth and all the complications that can bring with it.

I understand the hospital's side of it all; their job is basically to constantly check me and the baby for a number of potential signs of things not being normal in me birthing my baby. They are also used to women being scared, uninformed and needing a lot of help and guidance. Their number one method of providing this is pain relievers during the birthing(not pre-preparation during pregancy).

However, having read all that I have read and having the attitude I have about it; I don't think that is the best environment for me to have my baby in.
But since home births are forbidden in this country if you are a first time mother to be, we have no options. Unless we want to pay for the midwives ourselves, and that will cost way more than a pram, let me tell you. (We are in chock over how much a proper pram will cost us).

I so wish I could birth calmly, safely and uninterrupted with midwives who had some objective view of the medical model. Who will put it to use if neccessary and not focus on it, when it's not needed.
Who will strengthen me, be a mental and emotional positive support and encourage me to have my baby the way my body was designed to. Who will believe in me, my body, my baby and our ability to birth normally, and not question me all the time.

The response we got from todays meeting was somewhere along the lines of;
-Yes, but how will you handle the pain?
-Yes, but what if you can't handle the pain, have you thought about it then?
-Yes, but we might have to use Syntocinon to help things along.
-Well, what if you are so exhausted you need an epidural?

Pain, pain, pain... Sorry, I thought I was birthing a baby, not entering a chamber of torture?

A friends mother (who is not Swedish) said the other day; "Ah, these Swedish women giving birth, all they do is scream and focus on the pain. You need to be quiet, save your energy and focus on birthing your baby."
Amen!