Disbelief...

... is probably my strongest feeling right now. And shock. I can't really grasp that I'm pregnant. Am I really? And am I really going to be allowed to keep this baby?
The disbelief is protecting me from starting to obsess about a possible misscarriage.

But somehow the getting pregnant part always felt like the hardest piece of the puzzel. Quite miraculous actually. Conception is always a miracle, of course. But conception after importing frozen sperm from another country, time your ovulation, listen to your body, listen to the midwives and reading books all saying different things and deciding what to trust; then travle to a third country, defrost the little swimmers and actually have a conception take place? Does it sound do-able to you?

So now that I -unbelievably enough - somehow AM pregnant I just have a feeling our tiny fetus is an Amazone and will stay with us.

The night before Sunday I dreamed I got two positive pregnancy tests. Then I woke up. I'm afraid I still might do that. Wake up. And find it was all just a dream.

The plan now is just to get married, get on the plane to our honeymoon destination and relax in the sun and let it slowly, slowly sink in.

According to my google search Klumpis (as me and wifey call her) is now somewhere between the size of a sesame seed and a grain of rice. Her tiny heart beats approx. 200 beats per minute. She is all heart. Our little heart.

She is also very picky when it comes to her diet. I already discovered she likes proper food and has a strong distaste for candy, cakes or anything sugary. I had to try the wedding cake yesterday and felt like I was motionsick afterwards. Klumpis does NOT want sugar. She does want sushi.
Next she will want to go shopping in NYC, or she'll make me motionsick again.
I run it by wifey to see what she thinks...