"Baby J, I Am Your Father..."

Some time ago, wifey got baby J a Yoda doll. (Wifey is a hard core Star Wars fan since childhood). At first baby J was scared of the doll(who can blame him?). As he grew older, he came to love it. As soon as he sees it he bursts out lauging. (Yoda does look kind of funny). This past month Yoda had been left alone in our country house, while the rest of us spent 2+ weeks in the city. When baby J was reunited with his doll he shrieked with joy, burried his head in the dolls plush face and yelled " PA-PA!". OK. Is it time start worrying that the Star Wars influence on this family is getting a bit too much? I mean, yes, we might not be an ordinary nuclear hetero family. But I'm not too fond of the idea of my son growing up thinking a Yoda doll is his father. Wifey, on the other hand, is thrilled.

The Beard Issue

Some women do grow beards, and some men don't. But let's be gender normative and assume that beards belong to the male population. As such, beards might very well be something that fathers usually wears.
Which leads us to the brilliant conclusion of how to manage the absence of fathers in (most) lesbians families. In the manner of Santa Clause (who visits Swedish children on Christmas Eve) one could simply, as a lesbian mother, slip out of the house, claiming to buy a news paper. (In the 70's it was still PC to claim to go out to buy cigarettes). You then put on the beard you stashed somewhere convenient and re-appear in the household as a HO HO HO daddy.

If your significant other is attracted to bearded ladies, the beard might also come in handy on Date Night.

This, and other important issues, as when to call the social services on each other, is what we discuss at lesbian mama group.

A Black Marker...

...is a very handy tool if you are a Lesbo Mama and want to protect your child from feeling like an outsider before he even has a language.
For baby Js christening we got a baby book; those where you fill in blanks of height, weight, family tree etc. Of course there are blanks for mother and FATHER, of which baby J has zero.
Enter black marker and a little editing.

For Christmas baby J got a baby book with a cranky baby. How very suiting for our little tooth crank. Until cranky book baby started looking for his PAPPA.
Enter back marker, a little editing and now cranky book baby is looking for his MAMMA instead. She's in the kitchen making dinner. Sporting a beard.

Soon enough baby J will realize that a lot of babies have a mother and a father. And that society at large think this is the most desirable form of family.

But until he atleast has a language for his feelings and perceptions, I want to protect him from the stereotyped world and make him feel completely loved, safe and normal in his very ordinary family of 2 mothers.

Happy Belated New Year!

New Years Eve with a baby. Let me rephrase that; New Years Eve with a tooth-cranky baby. After putting baby J to sleep over and over again, it was 3 o clock in the morning and we realized that we were not going to get any "grown up time" and celebrate the New Year. We headed off to bed instead.

Earlier, at the magic struck of midnight I was stuck in bed breastfeeding the cranky little man, and had been for the past 45 mins. Wifey came with a wine glass of sparkly water and asked if I wanted a straw so we could toast the New Year.

As my friend A said; New Years is never the same after you have a baby. She has two and obviously knows what she is talking about.

Well, not being able to celebrate New Years (I accidently wrote New Tears, Freudian slip?), is no reason not to have a list of resolutions.

In 2012 I will;

Be a better Mama and take baby J to open pre-school more often
Obviously lose a ton of weight
Get more sleep (might need a miracle for that one)

I will let you know how it all works out!